You know the feeling, when somebody tells a story and you can’t pretty much understand a word or don’t get, what’s the point of the story, then the story ends and the listeners around look just as confused as the storyteller. Then you wonder, why even tell such story?
It requires practice and know-how to tell quality stories.
If you can’t tell stories, don’t do it! Learn it first and then try. Because, when you are telling the story, people around will make an opinion about YOU according to the quality of the stories told. So you can appear as dumb, confused or slow if you fail to deliver good story, and that’s not what you want, or is it?
Story telling is also great tool to evoke positive emotions in people and especially in women, by telling them good stories, you make them happier, evoke laughter (see article 15 ways to make a girl laugh) and you are entertaining – so you are not the boring guy, who asks simple questions like what she was doing, how was her day etc. all the time.
How to tell story to a girl – Crucial parts
- Binding – While there little or no problem starting telling story just like that, if you bind the topic of the story to the context spoken before, you have an advantage right from the beginning. The transition appears smooth and nonviolent then.
- Start – As for start, you should think about questions like – Is it a good idea to tell this story? What is the desired outcome of the story? Am I in the right social circle to tell such story? What parts of the story would you like to tell them and which to omit? Do all people around will be interested in this (that’s important especially when you talk about the situation that happened within a few people in the group, not all of them)?
- Logical sequence – The parts of the story should be bound together, it is important that the story has certain structure – beginning, main part, ending and all parts are properly connected. You should not jump from one place to another, if you omit something then better try to explain in later inconspicuously then go from the middle to the start and then return again.
- Hook – It is important to keep a girl interested and wanting for more. You are going to achieve this one by telling, some shocking things the story is going to be about at the beginning – You might say something like, as I was in Aspen this winter I was protecting my friend from the real Bigfoot. You are going to create expectations in the listeners (in this case a girl), she would think, it’s a nonsense and would try to listen carefully. Then you can twist the story like you had a fight with a drunken guy at the bar, and the guy was 6’5″ giant so he obviously had ‘big feet’. You should try to make the story awesome alone, so it doesn’t bring any disappointment after delivering.
- Ending – Every story should have an end, which is interesting and gives sense to the whole story. In the Bigfoot story it might be something like: After the fight we hugged each other, talked and drank a bit and I found out he’s a very cool guy actually, and he invited us to the same place next year.
- Characters – You like to describe them in a funny and bright way, so they add value to the story and make it better. There is no problem to make the characters a little bit unnatural for the case of fun. There should not be detailed character descriptions, if the characters are boring and ordinary.
- Intonation – You can use different tonality when telling a spooky story then when telling about race competition. You also want that the girl hears you clearly and understands every word, so generally it is better to speak slowly and loud enough. You can play with the pace, volume, pauses etc.
- Body language – By adding gestures with your hands and facial expressions, you are making the story much more vivid and the listeners engage. It is said that most of information perceived by other people comes from the body language, so it is important to master this part. (there is going to be an article about body language).
- Emotions – Especially when talking to a girls, it is important to evoke emotions. You can achieve this by focusing on her senses – In the Bigfoot story, it can look like this: “And then, all went silent, I saw that huge guy, big as a house, who glared at me with red, blooded eyes and clenched fists. He also smelled like a rotten fish, it was horrible”.
- Keep them engaged – Also another way to make the girl engaged, is the questions you ask your listeners during the story telling, those questions doesn’t require answer, their purpose is just to engage listeners more. “You know what happened then?”, “What would you think, how big his feet were?”, “Would YOU like to fight such guy? I didn’t!” and so on.
- Duration – It is not a positive sign to bore people around, just remember yourself, when you heard the longest story, and wanted it to end finally. Even if you are telling a great story, by making it too long you degrade it’s perceived quality. Then the opinion of the story is going to be “Yeah, it was kind of funny story, but it definitely could have been shorter”, instead of “Wow, that was a great story, I wonder what happened”, if you actually make it a little bit shorter.
Conclusion
I think telling story to the groups is much harder than to a girl, as you want all the listeners to focus on your speech and also want to reach them with your voice and a little stage fright might kick in. Also as they share the opinion after the story is told, they may become much more critical of you, if the story didn’t meet the expectations. So if you’re going to master story telling in the groups, you will become better accepted in your social groups and won’t have any problems whatsoever telling stories to the girls, it will become a piece of cake, in fact.
